walk to the cross day 5

the crying and sobbing is uncontrollable‚Ķ.. you have not felt this kind of pain EVER and rage is flying all through your body. Rage is coursing through your being, ¬†rage that you didn’t know existed‚Ķ‚Ķ.. (in between sobs) but I thought Jesus was the messiah, you said HE was the SAVIOR, what about my lamb, why did my/our spotless lamb have to be slaughtered/sacrificed for us‚ĶWHY WHY WHY‚Ķ‚Ķas quick and as fast as you can you run ¬†out of the grasps of your mama and daddy. This is all you know to do, running, it‚Äôs the only thing right now that feels right or safe, you just don’t know where where your running will lead you.

¬†your frantic run lands you in of all places, as close as you have ever been to the ONE you are most angry with, JESUS‚Ķ.the crowds that are swelling around him keep you out of arms reach of your punches, but close enough for your mental abuse to be hurled ALL over HIM‚Ķ.. you are able to stay close enough to hear Jesus instruct two of the men (Peter and John) to go and prepare the Passover, he tells them that they are to go back into Jerusalem, that they will see a man carrying a pitcher of water (you start to laugh hysterically inside, there will be hundreds of guys carrying pitchers how will they know) and they are to let the man know the Teacher needs the room for the Passover meal‚Ķ.(ARE you serious? more internal laughing come on‚Ķ.they aren’t gonna) off they (Peter and John) run! They are really going, this is getting whackier by the minute. I’m going too‚Ķ.you run as fast as your legs will carry you in order to keep them within eyesight.

¬†How did they know where to go? the town is crazy full of rooms, but they are walking very purposed and not wandering around looking lost and oh my word they are walking right to this man carrying a pitcher of water, good grief, the man is nodding yes and takes them inside the building and they are walking upstairs and the room is already set up‚Ķ.AMAZING‚Ķ.man I’m not leaving this area, look at em go, going about the room making sure everything is in order (temporary thought back to the table your mama and daddy are setting up with your spotless lamb, but you shake it off, you won’t let yourself think about this now)

¬†here they come, I hear footsteps, I gotta get out of the way……uh oh mama would tan their hides if she were here right now, they didn’t wash their feet, good thing she’s not here‚Ķ‚Ķwonder if they can hear my heart pounding out of my chest? my breathing seems frantic and is surely to give me away‚Ķ‚ĶDang, look at their faces, some are laughing, some aren’t saying much at all, especially that one guy that holds the money bag, he seems to be very concerned almost like he’s not part of the group, ¬†wonder what’s up with him?‚Ķ.. but the rest look a bit more relaxed as they recline at the table with Jesus, the conversation is starting to die down a bit as Jesus starts to talk, I can hear him but not great, gotta a bit closer. Wait a minute he is getting up from the table. Are you kidding me, he is wrapping a towel around his waist, filling up the water basin and he is going to wash their feet, where are the slaves? He is going over to one of the guys he told to prepare the room, he is knelling down, but Jesus called him Simon, I thought his name was Peter. Oh well that dude, simon/peter is not diggin Jesus washing his feet but finally humbles himself, wowzers he is washing everyone’s feet‚Ķwhy WHY, what is the purpose‚Ķ.oh my gosh I think I just heard Jesus say Messiah, was he talking about himself?

¬†Ok wait a minute, this is going way too fast in my head‚Ķ‚Ķhe just took a cup hoisted it up and stated that he wouldn’t drink fruit from the vine until the Kingdom of God has come, and now he is taking bread tearing it apart and handing to the boys around the table saying “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this to remember me.” this is my body, really what the heck does this mean? Now another cup after supper This cup is the new covenant between God and his people‚ÄĒan agreement confirmed with my blood, which is poured out as a sacrifice for you. Sacrifice, but, but, but the lamb, my/our spotless lamb, I thought that was the sacrifice, what is he saying‚Ķ.I think I need to get out of here, (as you turn to leave) you hear the words betray me, but you couldn’t make it all out‚Ķ.(dang do they know I’m here?) and you hear these words that change your world FOREVER‚Ķ For it has been determined that the Son of Man [fn] must die. But what sorrow awaits the one who betrays him.”

¬†NO NO NO NO‚Ķ..why must He die, is He THE sacrifice? oh my gosh, that’s what he is saying, He is the sacrifice that pays the price for the sin of the world. He is saying that He, the Son of Man, is the ONE we have been waiting on‚Ķ..MAAAAAAMMMMAAAA‚Ķ..DADDDDDYYYYYY I GET IT NOW, where is‚Ķ.mam‚Ķ.WAIT, NO‚Ķ.NOT HIM‚Ķ‚Ķyou can’t hear all of the commotion in the background, and the guy carrying the money, Judas Iscariot bolts by you, you can’t believe you weren’t trampled but he never saw you. Where is he going? ¬†Your mind is telling you to run but your legs are anchored, you cannot get away from the horror of thinking/believing that you too are the betrayer ‚Ķ.why must he that has never done anything to deserve this pay the price for me‚Ķ.it’s not HIS to pay‚Ķ.but HE wants to!

¬†As the remaining 11 men were rising from the table, Jesus is telling them that He must go, that the time has come for the Son of Man to enter into his glory and God will be glorified because of him. And since God receives glory because of the Son, he will soon give glory to the Son and then the following words connected the dots in your mind for what and why‚Ķ..they are words you heard come out of the man’s mouth a couple of days ago when the religious leaders and teachers of the law where questioning Jesus. The words bring you hope, the words allow you to walk again mentally and physically from your momentary paralysis

¬†So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

¬†as you allow the words to penetrate your being, you start to grasp that Jesus is the ONE, that Jesus is the Lamb of God and that HE is laying down HIS life, just as your spotless lamb did, yet this time it is FOREVER, it EVERLASTING to EVERLASTING! You don’t know how it’s gonna go down, but you know deep inside that it is and the look on the men’s faces as they exit singing a hymn of praise assures you that you have just encountered and believe JESUS is the Messiah, Jesus is Savior. As they head back to Mount of Olives, you head back home to mama and daddy with a story to tell and help ready prepare them for the coming events that will fill the world with GRACE!

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